Colorado fighter Michelle “The Karate Hottie” Waterson, now the “Karate Mommy”, has been making an incredible come back in MMA after becoming a mother six years ago and following Saturday’s big win she is now ranked top 5 in the UFC. She “wants gold” and it sure seems like her momentum can’t be stopped, until…
Sources say that recently the former UFC and WWE champ Brock Lesnar came out as a woman, at no surprise to fans worldwide, after suspicions of Brock being gay and then suddenly she started using a new custom finishing move called the “Kiss Of Death” which was clinically diagnosed as chronic halitosis. His fellow wrestling stars confirmed that is was a deadly move and the league had to ban it after several wrestlers were hospitalized and spent days in the ICU with lung problems. Not only was it a winning move which helped her rise to the top but some say that she did it just to get more intimate with the men since becoming a free-spirit liberal.
This wasn’t the only sign of things to come as people started to notice Brock slurring her “S’es” and starting to act a little more flamboyant.
Then the tattoo. When Brock got, what some people see as, a huge johnson printed on her chest there wasn’t any more questioning and thus a lot of the wrestling entertainment fan community named her “Cock Chester”.
When all the news began flooding social media, Lesnar suddenly got a huge progressive following on Facebook which was a shock cause most of them never knew who or what she, the WWE, UFC, or MMA was. This large group of Facebook users prematurely applauded Brock as if she became the ambassador of the widely popular progressive “Men on Men Action” group confusing it with what is actually short for “Mixed Martial Arts”. But the fans gave Brock the support she needed to get back in the ring and octagon with many encouraging stories and comments like one Facebook fan who posted “Brocky, you are such an inspiration to us all and I hope you show the world that woman can do anything men can do, but even better!”.
Brock took the comments to heart and decided to reenter the athletic arena once again. But this time as a woman! Just months before she was pressing the biggest men in the world over her head and throwing them across the ring like rag-dolls and destroying the greatest fighters in the world inside the UFC Octagon. Now with the full backing of the progressive movement headed by the Democrat party Brock is back and ready to take the sports in a more modern direction.
With the added strong “intersectional feminism” encouragement coming out of Hollywood as seen on award shows, tv shows, and even movies like Captain Marvel, Brock is now one of the biggest and strongest women to compete. Combine that with the empowerment from the liberal/left conformance of Sharia Law that’s now growing throughout communities all around the US, she is ready to spew women’s rights and get a whole new set of belts. The women’s belts! Recently in a podcast interview she mentioned how “there will be no tolerance for women not wearing their hijabs, Sharia in the United States will be more than whips and rocks, they will now experience Brocks”.
The feminists and progressives worldwide are praising the new Lesnar ambitions and goals to be the next UFC and WWE woman’s champions. Another exciting aspect for Lesnar fans is Brock, who has once weighted in at 265lbs, is now identifying as a “Strawweight” which would put her in the same 115lbs class as Michelle Waterson. Rumors surfaced that some social media users were negatively commenting on how this would be an “unfair” match and were going to “boycott the UFC” but the posts were taken down almost immediately after the Southern Poverty Law Center labeled it as “hate” forcing Twitter, Google (Youtube), and Facebook to terminate accounts. Breaking news out this morning is that Lesnar has just announced that with the chronic halitosis diagnosis she will also be competing in the Special Olympics wrestling competitions too.
Let’s end this article with an inspiring Facebook fan when she says;
“Dear Brocky, I’m so excited that you are being who you really are, your courage is so incredibly inspiring, and we will be rooting for you when you crush those stupid sissies. #LessHateMoreTolerance #BringTheBeltHome” ~April Fools